Ridiculous news: Justin Bieber launches nail polish line
So we caught wind of a ridiculous bit of news today: Justin Bieber is launching a nail polish line which will hit stores like WalMart (hopefully not ones here in Dubai) very soon. Yes, his publicist thought that being mistaken for a lesbian for his teeny voice and feminine facial features isn’t enough trauma for an adolescent kid.
Why not make money out of the gender ambiguity issue as well while people are at it, right? Here we are, thinking celebrity perfumes are already a desperate attempt at sucking the few remaining dirhams out of their fans’ pockets, and then a teenage boy comes along and exploits the bejeezes out of celebrity branding – as though the average Jane won’t notice she’s being taken for a ride.
At least celebrities who come out with a perfume line sort of pretend they are somehow involved in the production process. However which way you look at it, it’s more believable for Paris Hilton to consult on the top notes of her latest fragrances than for JBieb to suggest adding more glitter or brightening up the hue of his eponymous nail polish, so we don’t expect them to release a behind the scenes clip showing Justin hard at work.
But we’d be singing a very different tune, though, if he had pulled a Ricky Martin (or a Lance Bass) prior to this announcement.
We wouldn’t have been as surprised if Lady Gaga came out with a line of premium cut meat. Or if Adam Lambert starred in an ad campaign for a cosmetics company and promoted the hell out of a co-branded mascara or eyeliner. After all, we have come to associate the bottle-blonde performer with Jersey Shore-ish roots with raw, red meat following her rib-eye couture incident at the VMAs. The same goes for Lambert, who at least wears eye makeup more religiously than an average Arab lady. And that’s saying a lot: For the uninitiated, eye makeup is best-selling kind among women in the Middle East.
But this “Bieber’s so popular he can do anything and get away with it” is really getting out of hand. We hope JBieb’s camp is just conducting a social experiment on celebrity influence and trying to prove a point. Otherwise, it’s just sad. Maybe even sadder than naming a nail polish collection “One Less Lonely Girl”.